9:26 PM// Spanish? Nice Mullet.

You know what Spain is? The US in the 80's. Mullets and American 80's music abound. Seriously. And the worst part? You probably think I'm talking about the men. Well, they have mullets too; but I'm talking mostly about the women. Yep, the mullet is in vogue in Spain. Women actually pay to have their once beautiful hair cut short in the front and oddly layered in the back. {Shiver}. Outside of a museum in Madrid, I actually saw a woman with an exceptionally short haircut all over (think nearly shaved) and a foot-long rat tail in the back. An actual rat-tail. I thought they were hideous when I was in second grade, and I think so now, too. MacGuyver would fit in nicely there.

Hopefully, this fad will only go on for a few years, and then everyone will come to their senses and say, "what the Hell were we thinking?!" After all, that's pretty much what happened to Americans in the early 90's. Men are even better. The new fad for men is to nearly shave the sides of the head, leaving a near mohawk on top, continuing down the back, for a nice six inch mullet. Then be sure to add plenty of product so you look like a drowned rat. What's really interesting? Go to an Asian restaurant in Spain. Even the chinese waiters have mullets. Freaky.

It's not all mullets

Mullets aside, I could get used to the lifestyle. 30-35 hour work weeks. Two hour lunch breaks. Wine with everything. Late dinners. Paella with "fruits of the sea". Ironically their sense of style is very European -- clothing, shoes, hair product, "popped" collars -- but then they all have mullets. Go figure.

I had the good fortune to stay with a Spanish family for about a week. Lunch is the big meal of the day (like American & French supper). It starts about 2 or 3 o'clock and lasts one to two hours. Wine comes standard. Our Spanish family sometimes drinks the wine from a wine skin held several feet from the mouth, so that the wine has time to properly breath before reaching the palette. They made sangria and paella (which is basically risotto). Dinner is about 10 o'clock, but it's really more like a snack. It's not a serious event. Tapas and beer maybe.

Marriage

Our Spanish father had much to say on the topic of marriage, including the ridiculousness of coupling before the age of 29. Also, women are witches who know everything, so don't try hiding it. Be sure to use "preservatives" during sex (which is "muy bien") even if she says she's on birth control, otherwise her tummy will expand rapidly and a ring will find its way to your finger. Needless to say, the hand-gesturing, pelvic thrusting version of this story from a man missing the top three buttons on his shirt is much more engaging and effective.

Spaniards usually live with their parents until they get married (around 30). This is partially due to a simply cultural difference and the cost of living alone. Most people do not have jobs while in school like nearly all Americans do, so they could not afford to live outside mom and dad's place. While it seems like it may be difficult to court anyone while under the parents' roof, Spanish dates are allowed to enter each other's bedrooms undisturbed by parents (usually).

The Perks of Police Work

Our Spanish father is a cop. As such, he knows a great deal about Spanish law. For instance, we learned that while it is illegal to grow, sell, or buy marijuana, it is perfectly legal to possess and consume in one's own home. This as we were shown an impressive pipe and hasheesh collection.

Also, these Spaniards had quite an impressive CD collection, although most of them seemed to be burned. This wasn't particularly surprising since the father had an equally impressive DVD collection, obtained by pirating rented DVDs. He also used a peer-to-peer file sharing program to download the latest computer games and filmed-in-the-theather movies.

When we left, the father gave Katie and I a huge stack of burned CDs, complete with a copy of the jewel case cover artwork and track listing. We thought he was either extremely generous, or trying to unload his less desirable CDs to some appreciative young travelers. Then Katie had an insight: these CDs look an awful lot like the kind street vendors sell illegally. The kind that might be confiscated by Spanish policemen. And subsequently given away as gifts? Well, I'm working my way through them during this writing. Some are an interesting dose of culture, and others are not so good. But it's an experience.

Oh, and Picasso was a disturbed, crazy genius, and Spain is cheaper than France.